The future of resilient children – Teaching the power of grit
In an age where we have access to an endless stream of information, technology and convenience, it can be tempting to want to shield our children from challenges, difficulties and tough situations. As parents, caregivers and educators, it’s natural to want the best for our children, to keep them safe, happy and free from adversity. However, there’s one powerful skill that is not taught through ease, but through overcoming challenges: resilience. The ability to bounce back from adversity, to learn from setbacks and to develop grit is not only a crucial life skill but one that shapes the future of children as they navigate the world beyond childhood.
The perils of shielding children from life’s struggles
In a well-meaning attempt to protect children, many parents and caregivers make the mistake of stepping in every time their child faces difficulty. Whether it’s a challenging school assignment, a difficult social situation, or a sports team selection, parents may be inclined to intervene, solve problems or criticise those involved, such as teachers, coaches or classmates. This might seem like a loving, supportive gesture, but in reality, it undermines the very quality that will help children thrive: resilience.
While it’s essential to be there for children and offer support, shielding them from every setback or inconvenience does not prepare them for the real world. Life is full of challenges, disappointments and difficult people. If children are never allowed to experience these obstacles, they won’t develop the skills they need to overcome them.
“Parents and guardians, please stop trying to make life easy for your children.”
This statement underscores the idea that our role as parents isn’t to eliminate difficulties from their lives but to help them learn how to face and manage these challenges with confidence.
Teaching children grit
The ability to persevere through difficulties, known as “grit,” is something that can be cultivated over time. Research by psychologist Angela Duckworth has demonstrated that grit—defined as a combination of passion and perseverance for long-term goals—is a significant predictor of success. It’s not innate talent or intelligence that matters most, but the ability to keep going in the face of obstacles.
Here are a few ways that parents and caregivers can help children develop this critical skill:
- Let them fail – and learn from it. It’s tempting to shield children from failure, but it’s often through failure that children learn the most. Instead of rushing in to rescue them, allow children to experience disappointment, frustration and failure. When they fail, they’ll have the opportunity to process their emotions, reflect on what went wrong and figure out how to do better next time. Encouraging them to see failure as a learning opportunity rather than a defeat will help them develop resilience.
- Model resilience. Children learn a great deal by observing the behaviour of the adults around them. Show them how you handle difficulties in your own life. Share with them how you face setbacks, how you keep going when things get tough and how you maintain a positive mindset even when things don’t go according to plan. Your example will go a long way in helping them develop their own resilience.
- Praise effort over outcome. In a world that often focuses on results, it’s essential to praise effort over outcome. Instead of congratulating children only for winning or succeeding, emphasise the hard work they put into a task, their determination and their perseverance. By valuing the process over the result, you help children develop a growth mindset, where the focus is on continuous improvement rather than perfection.
- Encourage problem-solving. When children face challenges, resist the urge to immediately solve the problem for them. Instead, encourage them to think critically and find solutions on their own. Ask guiding questions that help them brainstorm ideas, weigh different options and make decisions. This promotes independence and confidence, two key components of resilience.
- Teach emotional regulation. Resilience isn’t just about overcoming obstacles—it’s also about how children manage their emotions in the face of adversity. Teaching emotional regulation—helping children understand and control their emotions—plays a crucial role in building resilience. When children can process their feelings of frustration, sadness or anger in healthy ways, they are better able to bounce back from setbacks and continue moving forward.
- Give them space to experience difficult situations. Situations such as being selected for a team or dealing with a difficult teacher who is stern, are not personal attacks—they are part of life. Helping children understand that not everyone will like them, not every situation will be fair and not every outcome will be in their favour is vital for building resilience. By giving children the space to face these difficulties and manage their responses, you are fostering their ability to navigate the complexities of life.
The role of parents in building resilience
Perhaps as parents and guardians, we should pause and think about how they need to adapt to all sorts of different and difficult situations in the future. The role of a parent is not to control every aspect of a child’s life or shield them from every challenge, but to be a guiding force as they learn to face adversity with confidence.
It’s important to remember that resilience isn’t built overnight. It’s a lifelong journey and it takes consistent effort and practice. By embracing difficulties as opportunities for growth and by offering children the tools they need to cope with challenges, we can ensure that they grow into resilient, resourceful adults who are well-equipped to handle whatever life throws their way.
In a world where the future seems uncertain and challenges are constant, resilient children will be the ones who thrive. They will know how to face difficulties with courage, adapt to changing circumstances and persevere through adversity. By teaching our children to embrace failure, value effort and manage their emotions, we are not only preparing them for the challenges of today, but also equipping them with the grit they need to succeed in the future.
Remember, resilience is not something children are born with—it’s something they learn through experience, support and guidance. As parents and educators, we have the opportunity to help children develop this vital life skill and set them up for a successful, fulfilling life ahead.
Mind Power courses
At Think Digital we’ve developed two short courses, Mind Power for Kids (ages 6 – 12) and Mind Power for Teens (ages 13 – 18), that is fun to take and teaches them how to navigate through life and remain positive and focused.
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Why not try our online learning environment by enroling for our free 14 day trial.
